Address Relationship Problems – The Us Factor Program by Joseph Melnick, Ph.D.

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5 Responses

  1. Peta G. S. says:

    My unborn child’s father is breaking up with me because he cannot forgive me for stuff that happened in the past that he said was disrespectful. Things seem great at times then suddenly I can’t touch him, or I shouldn’t talk to him. Then he gets real upset and even starts to use curse words saying he doesn’t care and its over. He doesn’t want me and stuff like that. I really care about him because he can be such a good boyfriend, and he’s been there throughout the pregnancy. He still is, but I need advice as to what I should do.

  2. John Doe says:

    If a wrong was done, and an apology made, and he cannot forgive after that, then you have some tough decisions to make. As for the intermittent distance, he may be ‘going into his cave,’ or ‘stretching the rubber band,’ as “Men are from Mars Women are from Venus,” explains. Stretching but not leaving, if you stay, it is said he will bounce back. The cursing is wrong and can be a sign of abuse. The saying its over calls for some couples counseling if he is willing. Good Luck with him and your unborn child.

  3. John Doe says:

    I have a son with a woman that I have been separated from since his conception, 7 yrs ago. I have sporadically been involved in their lives, seeing my son every weekend to once a month, to now every 3-4 months. The increasing time gaps are occurring because I seem to have “gotten my back up” over a issue with my ex. She was working night shifts and needed me to watch my son during the day, at her house. I made a comment I was going to take him to the store to buy him some candy. The store is only 100 ft away, and I was told, “I couldn’t leave with him to go anywhere.” From that statement, I read into it that I was too incompetent, irresponsible, and my judgment was lacking to care for my son. This has brewed for a while now and I am having great difficulty even calling them to be involved. I realize the negative, self defeating thought has taken root and grown strong, and I don’t know how to “fix” it or get rid of it. I have never been able to spend time with my son without my ex around, and I feel like I am always under scrutiny and judgment from her, and regardless of what I do, I believe she’ll never be trusting of my judgment to care for my son. This relationship is taking a toll on my mental and emotional state, its straining my other family relations, and I don’t know how to proceed. Any advice would be greatly appreciated, thank you.

  4. Patti says:

    Do you know why the mother treats you like she doesn’t trust you with your son? Have you tried to resolve this issue with the her? Your son needs his father. Period. It is important that your son’s well being takes the top priority. If your wife is unreasonable in your visitation or custody rights, why do you not take it to court? Consult with an attorney and have him/her send the mother a preliminary letter to sue her for fair terms of custody. Perhaps that will cause her to re-evaluate her power over the situation and you can create a written agreement without actually going to court in order to save a lot of money. The one who is hurt the most from your absence, and from the negativity between his parents, is your son. You can fix it now, and avoid much, much bigger problems when you son reaches his teens.

  5. Nat says:

    There is a whole journey ahead to “fix” your own issues you are admitting to, start that growth, in the mean time feel the pain and reality of Fatherhood, and do what is correct for your him, your son is more important than your feelings. His Mother might be looking for this paternal ability in you.

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