Repairing Relationships: Reflections and Fear of Commitment

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When repairing relationships take some time to reflect on fear, and the possible confusion about commitment. It's a metaphysical truism that each of our relationships is a reflection of some aspect of our own psyche. This means that your spouse, your other family members, your friends and your co-workers each represents some part of you. From a spiritual perspective, this demonstrates the principle that we are all One, a great wholeness of life, with individualized facets. Psychologically, this principle is symptomatic of our part in the collective unconscious of humanity. Our essential selfhood appears to be quite similar to everyone else's. We each require companionship, challenges, creative fulfillment and love. It seems that we keep ourselves separate, create illusory differences between each other from a sense of fear. In my experience, if we make the choice to trust that we really aren't that dissimilar to each other, fear dissolves. At this point recognition of the truth of our commonality with each other occurs automatically.

Development of this awareness is relatively simple and can shed some light on fears about relationship commitment. If one is willing to accept that the fundamental drives and desires of our associates are identical to our own the attachment to singularity dissolves. This isn't such a far-fetched idea, since we are all human and come from the same Spiritual Source. Take a look at those around you. See them as if they were you, living their lives for them. This can be surprisingly easy to do. It also enables us to understand their motivations with a great deal more clarity. If you imagine yourself living the life of another, your spouse for example, with his/her responsibilities, concerns and background, this person will seem to be much more like you than you may have imagined.

Fear and anger are the greatest tests of this level of awareness. But if we are willing to know another as if they were ourselves, it becomes necessary to give up these negative emotions. Interestingly, if you are willing to do this, you will see other's responses toward you change accordingly. I personally have seen some of the most cynical and paranoid people let down their guard and open up when this awareness is silently practiced. This is because we do not threaten ourselves. Another will recognize on some level that this is the reality we are functioning from and will lower their defenses. Being commited to give and receive love becomes more functionally an open possibility.

You don't have to tell anyone that you're doing this. It's actually more effective if you don't. Just look at people reflectively for a week or two and watch the changes take place. You may find it very rewarding a feel less of need to see individuality as two separate courses of expression.

Famous Quote: LOVE

"Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that."

--Martin Luther King, Jr.