Temper Tantrums at Bedtime - What is a Parent To Do?

Articles about parenting toddlers will tell you that at that age they need around ten hours of sleep each night. They will usually disagree with you, and the result is the dreaded bedtime fiasco of stalling, crying, and temper tantrums. This is especially true if your toddler is not an only child. Older children who are allowed to stay up a little later look like grown ups to these sleepy toddlers, and they want to stay up with them lest they miss anything.

This is an excellent time to take advantage of quality time with your toddler. If the fact that the other kids get to stay up later is an issue, make bedtime a very special quiet time for baby and parent. Read them a story all to themselves after a nice warm bath and all of your undivided attention. The toddler learns the discipline of getting ready for bed at a consistent time every night, and if you plan ahead and keep an hour before bedtime free of any other distractions, this should go pretty well. Do not rush the situation; the reward will be that the littlest angel is sleeping peacefully and you will have some time to yourself.

If the cause of the problem is not other children or a stubborn toddler, it may be that the baby is having dreams that upset them. You can't explain what dreams are very well at this age, but you can tell them that sometimes all the things that they see during the day play games at night in their head. Sometimes the games will wake them up, but you will be there and it is safe to go back to sleep. You may also want to read some books on the subject of bedtime parenting advice. Toddlers can be complicated little people if they can't articulate what they need. If the situation is overly volatile, there may be something else going on entirely or you may just have an active, creative, stubborn child.

Bedtime can be a challenge, ask other parents who have been there. Read articles about parenting and bedtime and you'll see what I mean, it's a very common part of raising kids. You can meet the challenge by having a plan, being consistent, and keeping your sense of humor.

By Anna 2007-06-25 09:10:20

I have a 22-month old daughter. Up until recently she was a wonderful sleeper all of a sudden for about almost a month now she started having tantrums before falling asleep and she says no sleep, no bed, and she will have a tantrum as soon as I leave the room. Sometimes she will fall fast asleep and then suddenly she will awake at 3am or 4am and she will be having a tantrum. She will yell and kick and scream at the top of her lungs. She has no tears and does not appear to be having a night terror. Help!

By An 2007-08-10 13:44:08

I have a 3 year old son who has made bedtime an absolute horror. My husband and I never had any problems until earlier this year (we moved into a new house before Christmas 2006). Now he won't stay in bed and screams like crazy. We have tried all the super nanny tricks - putting him back in bed without speaking to him and sitting outside his door - and we have tried gates (busted them down). Sitting outside his door works...but its like a treat for him. And since we started sitting outside his door, he won't stay in bed throughout the night....frequently up and in our room - send him back and he screams like crazy. Wake up in the morning and he's laying on the floor somewhere in the house. It has gotten even worse since the 4th of July. He would scream for hours at every pop. We are trying to be consistent...but I am at my whit's end! And so is my husband. Any suggestions?

By HA 2008-02-16 19:01:50

My two and a half year old son will not go to sleep unless I sleep with him in bed. This started when we switched him from his crib to a regular bed, so we have no control over keeping him in his crib utill he falls asleep. Also he wakes up in the middle of the night screaming wanting Mommy to sleep with him, or he comes into our room wanting to sleep next to me. I don't know how to teach him to sleep in his bed by himself.

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