Unfaithful Love - Reflections on Unfaithful Partners and Infidelity
Much to the sadness of those who have been the victims of an unfaithful partner, we live in a world of unfaithful love. You cannot fully understand the deep, life-draining pain of unfaithful love unless you experience it...and I would not wish this on my worst enemy.
The first realization feels somewhat like being hit in the stomach with a baseball bat. The one thing that does really bother me about it all is that a large number of individuals who become scarred by this injustice seem to commit this act against their mate at some point in their life. These would make you wonder if they were taught: “Do unto others as they do unto you,” instead of: “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”
I myself learned the pain of this when I was 20 years old. I was totally devastated and am still unable to remember the two days that followed. I had begun my marriage with the ideal of becoming one with my husband. I believed I would always be married to him, would die for him, and never have another man for the rest of my life. Sadly, the ideals of this 17-year-old bride were quickly crushed, and the ways of the world began to teach me harsh reality. I was divorced at the young age of 19 but felt much older due to the heartache this relationship bestowed upon me.
When I first found out that my first husband was cheating on me, I lost my breath...and the next two days were just a blur. I know of men who have been totally ruined and turned into heartless, bitter spirits targeting all women for the disceptions of the woman they had once loved. I have witnessed women vindictively setting the stage for the heartbreak of a man, and men inflicting pain on other women because of the injustices they have incurred.
This is a horrible state of affairs and at some point, we all need to scream, “STOP!” We all need to take a good inventory of what our goals are whenever we become involved with another human being and stop the constant betrayal of a union we have embarked on. It really does not matter if you are married, with a significant other, or just a dating couple. You and your mate both deserve respect by not having the other engage in romantic or sexual relationships outside of your bond. If you cannot give this to your partner, then you need to end the relationship so you are both spiritually free to see others.
However, do not think I am saying to take your commitment lightly! I am not! Once you have entered into a relationship, you owe it your best try before you move on. Relationships are not diapers to relieve yourself in and cast away. They should be entered into with the mindset of ‘forever.’ There’s no trial period given for a mattress, so why would there be with a person. Today’s world offers more possibilities of fidelity from our pet than our mate. Throughout history, the word ‘faithful’ has been used to describe the dog, and yet has not been portrayed about the human relationship.
Some species of snakes choose to mate for life. If its mate dies, the surviving snake will curl up by the deceased and lie there without nourishment until it too dies. I witnessed this sight as a child, and was deeply touched by it, and have carried it within me through my relationships.
Now, I ask you to think about what ‘fidelity’ means to you, and if it is something that is important to the entire structure of your future relationships. I believe your ability to stand strong with integrity will tell who you are, and what others can expect from you in all that you undertake. It is all about moral fiber and fortitude. Your ability to stand by your mate when the times are bad – to love him or her whenever you think you do not know what it is, and to give unto your mate all that your inner being desires another to give you – will show who the inner spirit truly is.
May your spirit outshine your body, and your body reflect your spirit. Remember: your spirit should dominate its physical dwelling at all times. This chapter is about being faithful – not only to your mate but yourself.
“Histories are more full of examples of the fidelity of dogs than of friends."
— Alexander Pope (1688–1744)
“If I were to select a watchword that I would have every young man write above his door and on his heart,
it would be that good word ‘Fidelity.’ I know of no better. The man who meets every obligation to the
family, to society, to the State, to his country, and his God, to the very best measure of his strength and ability,
cannot fail of that assurance and quietness that comes of a good conscience, and will seldom fail of the approval
of his fellowmen, and will never fail of the reward which is promised to his faithfulness.”
— Benjamin Harrison (1833–1901), U.S. president. Speech in Galesburg, Illinois.
Rhiannon Waits is a syndicated columnist with her column published in 14 different countries and translated into 4 different languages. You can purchase "Little Lessons on Love And Life" at Amazon.com, book private sessions, schedule speaking engagements, or attend book signings by calling 850-941-4190. You can also visit her web site at RhiannonWaits.com. Rhia lives in Pensacola Florida with her life partner, Steve, and her children. Rhiannon Waits is a renowned Psychic/Medium.